I was raised with 3 sisters and no brothers. I think I'm a caring person, but I wouldn't be so concerned with _only_ her comfort. I figure if I'm hot or stuck in the rain, she'd be in the same mess too.

I started the first thread, and haven't found anyone yet. Still have the same girl saying she wants to go who I started planning the trip with 6 years ago, but she isn't doing anything towards it. Still have a different ex-gf that wants to go, but I'd rather go alone than with her, even though she is really nice.

I posted an ad to craigslist and met a nifty girl (attractive, smart, rides, reliant, slaughters her own cows, has the same "better the experience then living for money" take I have on life), but last night, she sent me an email saying she's hooked up with another girl. Better finding out now, then getting dumped in India for a Hindu lesbian.

As Rachel said, "There's nothing quite like having someone to share the experience with."

Now where is that someone hiding....

--Dave

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Not Ted Simon since 1970!
http://nokilli.com/rtw

Don't feel bad - threesomes can be fun!

I have not read this entire thread but it seems to me that most of the post are "self" centered rather that partner centered. Most everyone that has posted is actively looking or would like a traveling/life partner, but to meet their own needs.

My question is this: is getting your own needs met as a primary motivator a recipe for a future failed relationship. It seems to me that the focus in the a great relationships that I have seen is mutual one-anothering.

Wiese, what is wrong with you ?
You have a wonderfull girl, she wants to come with you and then you don't want it ????

I have a wonderfull wife but she has absolutely no interest in long distance biketrips so I go alone on all my trips. I would give my left leg (mmmm.... would have to buy a trike then....) to have her with me on my trips.
Traveling alone has its advantages but when you are standing on the most beautifull place in the world, you realy want to share it with someone.

And from the lady's point of view, I agree with Maria. You just can't do that to someone you love and who loves you.

Stop being so foolish and go enjoy your RTW together.

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Jan Krijtenburg

My bikes are a Honda GoldWing GL1200 and a Harley-Davidson FXD Dyna Super Glide

My personal homepage with trip reports: https://www.krijtenburg.nl/
YouTube channel (that I do together with one of my sons): motormobilist.nl

I've held my tongue for way too long on this one!!
Wiese, any update on your situation after so many people have kindly shared their requested views?

Cake and eat it too...
Having been on the receiving end of this particular mind set, I wish that I was a meaner person. I would have enacted all of Maria's points with great gusto! (you're the best Maria!)

If you need affirmations from a group of international strangers about what you should do when it comes to someone you are supposed to care about, well, enough said. The answer is already starring you in the face.

Don't take her. She is prepared to give up everything and commit to you and something that is/was initially a love of yours and you aren't sure you can personally invest a smidgen of what she is. It won't work. The big question will become smaller questions that recur every day in your mind. If you can't make the decision when the going is easy, it will be a really rubbish situation when the going gets tough.

I agree with what has been said, it's the essential difference in mind set between someone that is prepared to view things from a couple perspective, versus someone who puts themselves first but doesn't mind the benefits (when they are benefits) of having a partner.

Second is not a good place to continually be placed, especially during something as life changing an adventure as a motorcycle trip can be.

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I remember walking around Avignon the first year I lost my wife. Worst thing was not having anyone along to enthuse and discuss what I'd seen. Now I'm doing an AWT (RWT in the American language) solo. (Hoping to share company for some miles along the route.) No way would I be doing this if she were still here, but you...you can have your cake and eat it buddy. I know that part of your trip is probably 'to find yourself' but taking responsibility for someone else is also an important part of lifes journey. In the end only you are the winner or looser, so ignore what we are all saying and go with your heart. (Heads tend to get filled with crap)

Perhaps a mini-trip for a week or so together would polerise your thoughts? After all what's a week in your lifes timetable?

Anyway my best wishes that you make a descision that turns out to be a good one.

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Happy Trails

Stagbeetle

It is not the Journey nor yet the Destination, that is the Prize; it is the people you meet on the way.

Blog on http://www.horizonsunlimited.com/tstories/fairless/

I haven't read the whole thing either, about half.... my thoughts are that it's possible to spend TOO much time with someone, you know. Sometimes a time apart is great. I left an awesome girl behind, with the knowlege that I'll never have her back, let alone see her again for a good many years. And I'm okay with that. This adventure is more important to me.

But that said, I'm 22, never had a serious relationship and (at the moment) never intend to. So there's my bias.

Good luck