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As a person who not only has done a bit of overlanding on both two and four wheels, but one who is into sailing - I have become familiar with the amenities needed for a a family to stay happy with the means of transport and accommodation.
Amenities such as "climate control" is most paramount and also the most challenging to solve. As you know, a vehicle that is not running or connected to the grid (running fans, A/C or heat) can under many conditions become unbearable in just a few minutes after having turned off the ignition. Even on a sail yacht, which is far more climate friendly to begin with, and with all its carrying capacity - the completely off grid solutions for climate control still becomes a very costly and difficult to solve great - especially in dealing with heat and humidity. In a car/truck/van/bus - this becomes both exponentially more challenging and more expensive to install, as well as far more cumbersome solutions to live with. Sometimes, a simple tent is the best solution.
As such, I would not even contemplate being off grid all the time with a vehicle, but rather equip it in such a fashion where I would only camp off the grid under close to ideal conditions. The rest of the time I would either stay in hotels or camp grounds with all amenities - including an electrical outlet I could hook the car up to. Or, I would just forgo the whole camper vehicle approach all together and just take a spacious 4x4, a tent, and very basic camping gear.
As for choice of vehicles. Any vehicle is "capable" of traversing every single country on the planet - but not all are equally "suitable". For me, only having two wheel drive, or low ground clearance, would be a definite no go. Having ABS, traction control and airbags would be a must for me personally. Size matters when it comes to both comfort and safety. Other than that - my focus would be on something with low mileage and good condition, that also has a decent reputation for reliability and ease and expense of maintenance.
I would not be so much concerned about fuel efficiency. With a group travelling together - in the grand scheme of things, an extra 50% or so in fuel consumption, won't amount to much.
I wouldn't know, but is it really that much expensive to ship a large vehicle as a smaller vehicle - presupposing we are talking about the same size shipping container? I would assume not if you had to pay for a full size container regardless?
Personally I would have gone for a converted SUV or van (4x4) - complete with roof mounted tent, a tent for the side of the vehicle, etc. The dream for me is of course a large expedition vehicle, like a Unimog or some other large off road capable truck. In the end though, a van or a SUV converted for camping will probably be more practical, enjoyable and safer - most of the time.
The list of suitable vehicles is in my opinion very long - as long as you are ok with also not always camping off the grid.
I have traversed Australia living out of an old station wagon. I've traversed much of Africa several times - on both motorbikes and 4x4. I've crossed Europe many times with simple sedans, much of the US as well. With a tent and some simple camping gear - not once have I felt it a "must have" to have an RV or expedition type vehicle. I have also travelled with such vehicles, and caravans as well - but I think that the "extras" they provide are greatly overrated - much of the time. I prefer to book cheap accommodation or pitch a tent more often than I prefer dealing with all the draw backs of living within the confines of a vehicle. I think a vehicle that is suited for driving and hauling gear between accommodation locations is far more enjoyable than a vehicle meant for living in.
When travelling I prefer to have someone else cook most of my warm meals, and usually only make my cold meals myself. I therefore have no needs for refrigeration, having great amenities and equipment for both advanced cooking and extensive dish washing, including carrying extensive amounts of water and extra fuel, etc. I also prefer not to have to deal with waste disposal from a toilet, or to deal with all the hassles that showering out of a vehicle entails. If nature calls in the bush - I bring a roll and a shovel if nature calls, I swim in a lake or the ocean when I get sweaty, and do any cooking over an open fire, and sleep under the open sky or in a tent. I have enough clothes that I don't have to do laundry until I get to a place with a sink with hot water. I get my coffee at the closest gas station, and my dinner at some inexpensive hole in the wall. The rest of the time - for all my other needs - I stay on grid!
In short - sometimes "less is more".
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