Five surgeons are being interviewed for an article in The Lancet. The journalist was asking them who makes the best patients to operate on.
The first surgeon, sez: "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."
The second, responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is colour coded."
The third surgeon, says, "No, I really think librarians are the best! Everything inside them is in alphabetical order."
The fourth surgeon, chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers...Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over.”
But the fifth surgeon, shut them all up when he said: 'You're all wrong. Tory Cabinet Ministers are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no brains, no balls and no spine. Moreover, the head and the arse are interchangeable!
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You will have to do without pocket handkerchiefs, and a great many other things, before we reach our journey's end, Bilbo Baggins. You were born to the rolling hills and little rivers of the Shire, but home is now behind you. The world is ahead.
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