Solo trip without significant other

[rtw1day]

who here has done a lengthy trip without their significant other? there is no way my wife would be able to leave home due to commitments for longer then 7ish days, between kids, animals, elderly relatives she is unable to trip like its our 20s again.....

how did you get the approval, how did it work, was it worth it, what would you change?

[backofbeyond]

I've done a number of long solo trips over the decades since Mrs B-O-B and I married but I'd be loath to give you general advice as it 'all depends'. I've picked and chosen my times based on our circumstances and twice cancelled long planned trips at the last moment (once on the morning of departure) when things changed. What I've never done is announce over breakfast I'm off somewhere in a week or two and can you look after the toddlers, pay the mortgage and, oh, sorry about your mother's terminal care needs. I should be back in six months or so. You have to turn it round and think how would you feel if she announced she's off to a spiritual retreat in the Hebrides for three months and dumped everything on you.

The reason I've been able to do it is that we have a similar outlook on things. Not identical but similar. So when I say I'm planning a trip to West Africa I know it'll be solo trip as she doesn't have any interest in going there. But I know she'll understand why I want to do it so if we can work through the practical difficulties it'll cause it won't be embargoed on principal. For other destinations she'll be as enthusiastic as me - we've done several long bike trips in the US together, toured China and should have been in Japan next month were it not for Covid.

Solo travel can be psychologically difficult and not everybody is suited to it. Only you will know whether it's something you can take in your stride or whether you'll find it too difficult a few weeks in. It is easier if you have someone to bounce your worries off of. For me though it has most definately been worth it. I've got a short (2-3 week) solo Eurotrip in the pipeline for next month - CV-19 permitting - and I should have been finishing off a 4 week solo trip (all of August) at the moment. That was Covid cancelled and rescheduled for next year but it may then become the two of us going as she's getting more and more interested in my idea.

[AnTyx]

Originally Posted by rtw1day

how did you get the approval

Not that I've done it, but my approach would be: give her an extended private vacation of similar length first - at a nice warm seaside resort somewhere, while you take care of the kids and animals and elderly relatives.

[Tomkat]

Mrs T is quite OK with me disappearing for 6 months once this virus dies down. But then, she's something of a gem, and she still works while I'm retired (sadly can't afford to be a kept man though). The kids have left home and throughout our married life we've gotten used to being apart, as my job has often meant living miles from home.

Last year I did a short Eurotrip as a test run for me and the bike, and all went well (it helped that she flew down to Croatia to meet me on a beach for a week). She has suggested she might like to fly out and meet me in Almaty or Bishkek, but with her working holiday times tied to academic terms I'm not sure if that will be possible.

That said, I think I'd be stretching it somewhat if I suggested being absent for years at a time, or doing extended trips every year.

[rtw1day]

Originally Posted by backofbeyond

I've done a number of long solo trips over the decades since Mrs B-O-B and I married but I'd be loath to give you general advice as it 'all depends'. I've picked and chosen my times based on our circumstances and twice cancelled long planned trips at the last moment (once on the morning of departure) when things changed. What I've never done is announce over breakfast I'm off somewhere in a week or two and can you look after the toddlers, pay the mortgage and, oh, sorry about your mother's terminal care needs. I should be back in six months or so. You have to turn it round and think how would you feel if she announced she's off to a spiritual retreat in the Hebrides for three months and dumped everything on you.

The reason I've been able to do it is that we have a similar outlook on things. Not identical but similar. So when I say I'm planning a trip to West Africa I know it'll be solo trip as she doesn't have any interest in going there. But I know she'll understand why I want to do it so if we can work through the practical difficulties it'll cause it won't be embargoed on principal. For other destinations she'll be as enthusiastic as me - we've done several long bike trips in the US together, toured China and should have been in Japan next month were it not for Covid.

Solo travel can be psychologically difficult and not everybody is suited to it. Only you will know whether it's something you can take in your stride or whether you'll find it too difficult a few weeks in. It is easier if you have someone to bounce your worries off of. For me though it has most definately been worth it. I've got a short (2-3 week) solo Eurotrip in the pipeline for next month - CV-19 permitting - and I should have been finishing off a 4 week solo trip (all of August) at the moment. That was Covid cancelled and rescheduled for next year but it may then become the two of us going as she's getting more and more interested in my idea.

I think the flexibility bit is going to be the key! knowing that if really needed I can postpone, suspended or finish any trips to help out will be a big factor, thanks!

[Surfy]

It depends always on your relationship I guess.

I did broke after my Panamerica (not finished yet) - but the relationship was`nt fine before. What I just saw as I did travel alone for 6 Months. Bevore I dindnt had time to analyze how it is. (Everthing was nice, relationship, sex, dailylive - but no true love anymore).

My current girlfriend I wouldnt leave alone for that timeframe, also if she would let me go... I would look for something we can share together, not to spend time for solo..

Surfy