Jeremy Clarkson view of motorcyles
 

Just came accross this... FAF and worth reading to the end :rofl:

From Jeremy Clarkson....

Recently, various newspapers ran a photograph of me on a small motorcycle. They all pointed out that I hate motorbikes and that by riding one I had exposed myself as a hypocrite who should commit suicide immediately.
Hmmm. Had I been photographed riding the local postmistress, then, yes, I'd have been shamed into making some kind of apology. But it was a motorcycle. And I don't think it even remotely peculiar that a motoring journalist should ride such a thing. Not when there is a problem with the economy and many people are wondering if they should make a switch from four wheels to two.
Unfortunately, you cannot make this switch on a whim, because this is Britain and there are rules. Which means that before climbing on board you must go to a car park, put on a high-visibility jacket and spend the morning driving round some cones while a man called Dave - all motorcycle instructors are called Dave - explains which lever does what.
Afterwards, you will be taken on the road, where you will drive about for several hours in a state of abject fear and misery, and then you will go home and vow never to get on a motorcycle ever again.
This is called compulsory basic training and it allows you to ride any bike up to 125cc. If you want to ride something bigger, you must take a proper test. But, of course, being human, you will not want a bigger bike, because then you will be killed immediately while wearing clothing from the Ann Summers "Dungeon" range.
Right, first things first. The motorbike is not like a car. It will not stand up when left to its own devices. So, when you are not riding it, it must be leant against a wall or a fence. I'm told some bikes come with footstools which can be lowered to keep them upright. But then you have to lift the bike onto this footstool, and that's like trying to lift up an American.
Next: the controls. Unlike with a car, there seems to be no standardisation in the world of motorcycling. Some have gearlevers on the steering wheel. Some have them on the floor, which means you have to shift with your feet - how stupid is that? - and some are automatic.
Then we get to the brakes. Because bikes are designed by bikers - and bikers, as we all know, are extremely dim - they haven't worked out how the front and back brake can be applied at the same time. So, to stop the front wheel, you pull a lever on the steering wheel, and to stop the one at the back, you press on a lever with one of your feet.
A word of warning, though. If you use only the front brake, you will fly over the steering wheel and be killed. If you try to use the back one, you will use the wrong foot and change into third gear instead of stopping. So you'll hit the obstacle you were trying to avoid, and you'll be killed.
Then there is the steering. The steering wheel comes in the shape of what can only be described as handlebars, but if you turn them - even slightly - while riding along, you will fall off and be killed. What you have to do is lean into the corner, fix your gaze on the course you wish to follow, and then you will fall off and be killed.
As far as the minor controls are concerned, well . . . you get a horn and lights and indicators, all of which are operated by various switches and buttons on the steering wheel, but if you look down to see which one does what, a truck will hit you and you will be killed. Oh, and for some extraordinary reason, the indicators do not self-cancel, which means you will drive with one of them on permanently, which will lead following traffic to think you are turning right. It will then undertake just as you turn left, and you will be killed.
What I'm trying to say here is that, yes, bikes and cars are both forms of transport, but they have nothing in common. Imagining that you can ride a bike because you can drive a car is like imagining you can swallow-dive off a 90ft cliff because you can play table tennis.
However, many people are making the switch because they imagine that having a small motorcycle will be cheap. It isn't. Sure, the 125cc Vespa I tried can be bought for £3,499, but then you will need a helmet (£300), a jacket (£500), some Freddie Mercury trousers (£100), shoes (£130), a pair of Kevlar gloves (£90), a coffin (£1,000), a headstone (£750), a cremation (£380) and flowers in the church (£200).
In other words, your small 125cc motorcycle, which has no boot, no electric windows, no stereo and no bloody heater even, will end up costing more than a Volkswagen Golf. That said, a bike is much cheaper to run than a car. In fact, it takes only half a litre of fuel to get from your house to the scene of your first fatal accident. Which means that the lifetime cost of running your new bike is just 50p.
So, once you have decided that you would like a bike, the next problem is choosing which one. And the simple answer is that, whatever you select, you will be a laughing stock. Motorbiking has always been a hobby rather than an alternative to proper transport, and as with all hobbies, the people who partake are extremely knowledgeable. It often amazes me that in their short lives bikers manage to learn as much about biking as people who angle, or those who watch trains pull into railway stations.
Whatever. Because they are so knowledgeable, they will know precisely why the bike you select is rubbish and why theirs is superb. Mostly, this has something to do with "getting your knee down", which is a practice undertaken by bikers moments before the crash that ends their life.
You, of course, being normal, will not be interested in getting your knee down; only in getting to work and most of the way home again before you die. That's why I chose to test the Vespa, which is much loathed by trainspotting bikers because they say it is a scooter. This is racism. Picking on a machine because it has no crossbar is like picking on a person because he has slitty eyes or brown skin. Frankly, I liked the idea of a bike that has no crossbar, because you can simply walk up to the seat and sit down. Useful if you are Scottish and go about your daily business in a skirt.
I also liked the idea of a Vespa because most bikes are Japanese. This means they are extremely reliable so you cannot avoid a fatal crash by simply breaking down. This is entirely possible on a Vespa because it is made in Italy.
Mind you, there are some drawbacks you might like to consider. The Vespa is not driven by a chain. Instead, the engine is mounted to the side of the rear wheel for reasons that are lost in the mists of time and unimportant anyway. However, it means the bike is wider and fitted with bodywork like a car, to shroud the moving hot bits. That makes it extremely heavy. Trying to pick it up after you've fallen off it is impossible.
What's more, because the heavy engine is on the right, the bike likes turning right much more than it likes turning left. This means that in all left-handed bends, you will be killed.
Unless you've been blown off by the sheer speed of the thing. At one point I hit 40mph and it was as though my chest was being battered by a freezing-cold hurricane. It was all I could do to keep a grip on the steering wheel with my frostbitten fingers.
I therefore hated my experience of motorcycling and would not recommend it to anyone.
The Clarksometer
If you like misery, climb aboard

:rofl::funmeteryes:

I hardly ever find anything funny following a description of "Must read. Really funny." However, this one was really funny, and a must read.

Classic Clarkson!!:clap:

Must admit I laughed my head off and thought it was worth a post:thumbup1::mchappy:

my wife an Clarkson are normally complete opposites in EVERYTHING!

My wife is still cute after 40, Jeremy has lost his boyish looks.....

My by wife is female, Jeremy is far too hairy to be one despite his behavior around bikes....

My wife has lovely brown colour to her skin, Jeremy is pastey coloured. (maybe he's been driving a bike again?)

my wife at less than 5 foot makes a good pillion.........

But both think death lies round EVERY corner when you ride off using 2 wheels instead of 4 wheels doh.

Still I can't have everything now can I?

Well actually you have to consider all his points carefully because they're correct. What he doesn't mention is the absolute phenomenal feeling of freedom you get when you ride:clap:

Jeremy Clarkson feared deaths in Argentina number plate row | Television & radio | theguardian.com

No doubt another "accident" from Clarkson, just like all the other racist, chauvinist toss he accidentally "mispeaks". I just came from Argentina and will return for the TDF, Argentina - a country with great hospitality and one I loved traveling overland. Well, the story above is just great isn't it! Clarkson and his chums really are very far from the sort of people and mentality you want representing Britain.

:ban:

I must disagree with this comment. Explain why is he racist ?. Another overused label mis - applied too often without justification.

Also it appears on first checks carried out on the cars and the reg numbers appear to be genuine to the cars - (even if they were not does it really matter so much) - the Argentinians did invade the Falklands an island under sovereign protection and that was whilst their own country was under the control of a raging despot dictator clinging to anything for power including wasting many lives on both sides of the war on an unjust campaign).

As for top gear its a tv show with a degree of cheek. In anycase any anagram association the Argentinians have put to this is of little or no consequence.

No doubt you object to John Cleese and the faulty towers - Germans sketch - which if anything was far more politically insensitive - but was taken for what it was Humour - along with many but also guess who - the Germans.

The British have always tried to maintain a sense of humour and been able to laugh at ourselves as well as others, unfortunately this is becoming harder with the politically correction and racist police shouting the loudest at the slightest thing that might offend someone , anyone.

Clarkson although not to everyone taste has tried to keep some degree of non politically correct options open in his writing and journalism. yes its laddish but so what.

Somehow his TV programs have an almost world wide following except in certain countries where a sense of humour is lacking and the political police have ruled out everything else.

In 1949 George Orwell wrote a book 1984 which depicted a rather totalitarian view of the world, unfortunately to a large extent this country has slid down that road and such sensitivities push us further down that road.

On a final note - I served in the Falklands - and can tell you your very hospitible people the Argentinians were not all whom you seem to think they were, many were fine upstanding soldiers, sailors and airmen - but alas not all and their were some whom threatened and mistreated Civilian Falkland islanders - others ransacked outlying homes - the occupants were left without food or supplies - in what is believe me a very harsh environment and had to move out to the safety of other settlements - so no the Argies were not all saintly and goody goody.

Tchus jake.

what a load of tosh! (offensive homophobic tosh if you want to talk discrimination!!). Reported to mods as such.

hardly marks you out as the voice of reason, openmindedness and equality does it!

It's not supposed to be serious TV

Shouldn't be so uptight about a set of islands hundreds of miles from their coast that they have no legitimate claim to!!

Fair point about that, edited. Never crossed my mind that it was homophobic, I always took the meaning to be someone who is like a sycophant, but I suppose on reflection I can kinda see the origin!

I take it you're joking otherwise that is surely a contender for the most ironic statement of this century!

Jake,

Anyone who uses the n-word is beneath contempt as far as I`m concerned. Likewise, using "slope" to describe someone from Thailand is neither acceptable nor good comedy. I would agree with you about censorship, but comedy should be morally defensible. I am not familiar with the Cleese sketch, but I suppose the joke would presumably be pointed at attitudes or social discourse, rather than Germans or the atrocities of WWII per se. There was an interesting article by Steve Coogan in the Guardian, he said;

If I say anything remotely racist or sexist as Alan Partridge, for example, the joke is abundantly clear. We are laughing at a lack of judgment and ignorance. With Top Gear it is three rich, middle-aged men laughing at poor Mexicans. Brave, groundbreaking stuff, eh?

As for the Falklands, I am sure everything that can be said has already been said. No doubt there are unscrupulous Argentinians out there, though my experiences of the country were overwhelmingly positive. Out of interest, have you actually been to Argentina and traveled around? Judging a people by the crimes their military commits during a war hardly seems a decent or fair comparison. It just seems to me that it is best to be compassionate about sensitive issues and try to be respectful of the history, laws and customs of the places you visit.

Cheers!
Rtw

Ride the world - Firstly no i have not been to Argentina however I have been to Uruguay along with a few other south american countries and have no problem with south american people. I have a close mate that taught in Argentina as well as ran the national rugby team in Buenos Aires and speaks very highly of the people he encountered.

I do wonder if the lynch mob that set about clarkson and his team are representitive of the Argentinian people - acting without a hearing or a trial they set about people quite legally going about their business - even if you don't agree with it such actions are certainly not acceptable as a retaliation. Are those people going to be put before a court for affray criminal damage etc. I doubt it. I think the threats and damage far outweigh what they percieve as a dig from number plate referencing a war over thirty years ago. It all seems unbalanced to me and again the story is read only the way that certain people want to read it - that is without any form of balance or fairness.

However do not like the way you interpret my words that i judge all the nation of Argentia by saying ' Judging a people by the crimes their military commits during a war hardly seems a decent or fair comparison.'.
I never judged them and stated that many of the military were fine upstanding soldier, sailors and airmen. (Bye the way the Argentinian airmen pilots were notable in the bravery and skill). I also know that the men on the ground are just that -pawns in a game of chess played by regimes and government etc.
At no point have i mentioned that the Argentinian people as a whole are bad or anything else. I simply pointed out that not all the men in the conflict were good or descent.

At the end of the day people are people and I make no judgment on that.

Clarkson recited an old poem and corrected himself before saying the N word as you put it and did not complete the word in anycase. As for the use of slope - yes a bad choice for an educated man but does not define him as racist per se .

He like me is from an time when certainly up here in the north slang and names were used as everyday language - not i have to agree always correctly but not always used as a way of meaning offence either. Maybe he made a slip up from his past.

At sea i worked with people from different nations Scots were jocks, Welsh were Taffies, Irish were micks or paddy's and Asians were paki's (no matter if they were pakistani or not) Dutch were clonkydonks and so on. None of the terms were at the time considered anything more than a description of the persons background neither negative or positive - now all that has changed.

Now many of these terms are classed as racist, then we have the never ending interpretation of sexist and equality - i can not go on to that we will be here all day.

To sum up i don't believe clarkson to be racist, he works for the BBC and will mix with people on daily basis from every walk of life, sexuality and culture so one would think he will be wholly comfortable interacting and working with anyone - this in itself is one of the greatest ways to break down barriers of predjudice around.


I by the way do not judge nations by the actions of a few or despot leaders, I do not hold the English above anyone else nor do i believe in apologising for the past. I can't stand political correctness and the way it mutes and distorts free speech, thought and historical interpretation.

I do not like the way facts are twisted and misquoted to achieve a perspective that suits the needs of such a system, nor the fact that it tells me what i can and can't like, think or agree with.

I agree that one needs to be sensitive to peoples beliefs and culture but that does not mean being or requiring you to be dishonest to your own experiences, viewpoint and belief.

Maybe in the eyes of the politically correct that make me a racist, homophobic, sexist then so be it.

At least I will be free to give that opinion.

Tchus jake.

well, that cleared that relatively amicably!!

bier

My comment about Argentinas claim to the Falklands is based on Historical evidence. The Argentinians stake their claim back to a particular point in History which conveniently suits their argument, one which was developed to drum up some sense of nationalism and distract the popoulation away from the problems at home (this may sound contemporally familliar closer to home!!) if you go right back, the British first discovered, claimed, and settled the islands (not all at the same time)

You cannot lay a sovreign claim toa country based on the idea you think you owned it 400 years ago, if we did that we would be making claim to a sizeable chunk of the world! Not something I would particularly wish for. The Falkland Islanders have made their choices and those choices should be respected by all, including the UK

Read this article it puts a different slant on the Clarkson / Argentina episode

Full Text of Jeremy Clarkson's article in the Sunday Times. (I got it from an electronic resource hub from my university. There are a few typos in the form I was able to access, but this is directly sourced.) Enjoy! : TopGear

Loved the content of the initial post : ) Thanks for posting this excerpt. It reminds you that on the face of it riding bikes doesn't make sense. But it doesn't have to. Those who don't 'get it' leave those of us who do, feel a bit better about themselves as we are the enlightened ones!

As for the Argentinian event, well the Top Gear team do have a reputation.... to live down to

Due to all the criticism and the fact that the top gear team have been subject of all kinds of what they say are false claims and mis-doings of stirring things up as well as also pressure from the Argentinians to apologise Top gear have decided to let their 350 million regular viewers from 170 countries across the world make up there own minds as to what happened.
So we can all see for ourselves - the Argentinian Christmas special will after all now be transmitted and shown in two parts on 27 and 28 December.

Jake.

I think Clarkson is a arrogant tosser myself, i only watch the show for the power laps & more often i do that on Youtube now, the adventures they started doing are pretty childish & hardly entertaining.

Each to their own i guess.

Mezo.

good, some people take things too seriously.

Clarkson himself states in his weekly rants in the press they are simply enterainment for the mass - more like scenes from the silly antics of the ''Last of the summer wine'' crew (A tv program set in Yorkshire for those that do not know it) - i don't think he with his massive road crew and back up cl;aim to be real adventurists. He openly admits having local guides and fixers for everything to make the programs work. Top gear and Clarkson are not really try to claim this to be real adventures - not like the knarlly stuff everyone gets so uperty and protective about.

Its tv entertainment nothing more.

What you think of him or anyone else is obviously your own view - nothing wrong with that.

However some people do take the show and the protection of Adventure stuff far too seriously. I remember when we used to call it touring - back in the day before it became trendy to be an adventurist.

Jake.

I'm still not sure when I stopped motorcycle touring and started adventure biking. Probably the first time I went out of the country on a set of knobblies rather than road tyres. Or maybe it was when I started using MX boots rather than regular shoes. Either way, none of that old fashioned stuff for me nowadays - unless it's a retro tour where I set off in an ironic way, deliberately using that inferior 70's or 80's stuff to remind myself how far the bike world has come.

Unlike many of the contributors to this thread (and other similar topics elsewhere) I quite like Clarkson. I don't know him, have never met him (and given my lifestyle these days I'm unlikely ever to do so) so I can't make a judgement on what he's actually like but I find most of his TV stuff amusing in a lightweight comedic way and most of his written stuff well constructed and interesting to read even if it is deliberately hyperbolic and occasionally provocative. Most of the time, both on tv and on the page I can see the joins, and I find that endearing as well. As was said it's all very "last of the summer wine" with all three of them playing their parts close to perfection. Top Gear really is the bastard love child of Dad's Army, That's Life and Whicker's World (sorry to anyone not UK based ), weaned on a diet of petrol and tyre rubber, and with Clarkson the perfect inheritor of Captain Mainwaring's bluff, bluster and pomposity. It really wouldn't work if he (or any of them) were Mr Bland (see Top Gear USA as an example). The show is OTT fantasy so they have to be larger than life as well.

I'm impressed that they've managed to keep the format going for so long and a lot of hard work obviously goes on behind the scenes. As a moneyspinner for the BBC I just hope they don't push Clarkson too hard. It looks like he has a substantial workload, he doesn't look like the fittest of blokes and he's getting on a bit these days as well.

As for bikes, well, who cares. Clarkson's comments on them are in much the same vein as his comments on everything else from politicians to pots and pans. - something to be admired more for the delivery style than in the substance of what was said, more Leonard Sachs than high court judge (again sorry to non UKers). If bikes were an integral part of the show they'd need a seriously good 2 wheel stig to stunt ride for the cameras and there's not really much visual impact in just riding fast with the wheels in line. Other than the occasional hot climate comedy trip (Vietnam) it's logistically a lot harder to do some wacky project on bikes than in cars / boats etc. Not only that but bikes are almost all cheap enough for them to be affordable (more or less). Most of the cars are all wet dream fantasy stuff subsequently shown to be useless as actual transport. I'm happy they stick to four wheels and leave the bikes to us.

I remember very well my first big tour i went alone - (Adventure as they are now known) 1978 - bmw r65 road bike - uk / spain / morocco i was wearing a Lewis leather jacket (bad choice far to hot), levi jeans and some semi leather ankle high trainers and an open face helmet. The bike shod in road tyres on cast wheels of the time managed to cover everything that morocco could throw at it and me from dirt tracks to avoiding massive badly driven lorries. It was my first experience and to be honest i initially hated it - I was too hot and out of my depth in a culture i did not understand, nor feel very comfortable with, i suffered terrible with the trots and generally felt unwell - I loved a few places i saw Bhalil and its cave type houses, FEZ was intriguing both come to mind along with one or two other places along the way - but some places felt hostile and seemed dangerous - which they were not but it all was new to me and felt that way. I I was helped by and met some very friendly people but all said and done i was glad to get back to the UK on that occasion.

Oh bye the way i like clarkson - some of his writing and anedotes are both funny and pointed, he tries within the constraints of the BBC and the huge weight of the press industry that he writes for to raise matters in a comical and light hearted way often contrasting with the political correctness big brothers, along with the liberal extremism that has raised its head and controls thought and opinion by calling everyone , Homophobic, racist, sexist or whatever other ist's they want to label people with.
Jake.

Cleland you have taken a snippet of my quote and it seems conveniently left off the bit where i mention i thought many of the Argentinian servicemen were fine upstanding people - maybe that does not fit your argument.

Yes i have to agree i have not travelled in Argentina so maybe that part of my rant would be without grounds but i do not claim to have travelled there it was simply an answer to a question put to me.

In the world that i have experienced and lived in i am afraid not all people are nice nor are they all bad but i have met people from both sides of that coin some very nice and some wickedly bad.

I passed comment on some of the things i saw some of the bad guys had done - so i judged those guys yes, but not the Argentinian nation as a whole.

If we do not make assessments or judgement's based on our own experience or perceptions of events that happen in our lives or those around us - whether that is good or bad then what is the point - in travel, or any life experience. ?

Did i bash rtw sorry if i did - I did not mean too - its just an open discussion and he - i believe misquoted me.

I like to have debate its healthy to get things out in the open i also believe it is good to hear other peoples opinions/ views and experiences and have often had my opinion changed by listening and learning to other folks point of view and experiences on this forum or at travellers meetings.

If i have upset anyone at all i really am sorry for that.

jake.

ps

My rants and views are not personal or anything - maybe at worst a clash of opinion - but then again that might also need to be banned along with politics.

For once I see there are other's that see Crapson as the person he is. A player out of dad's Army, was well put. The problem is, some people believe what he say's or write's.
John933

4. Gross Hypocrisy given your above post

5. Frankly, the whole thing is ridiculous. Getting so wound up over a car number plate on a car show because of some obscure and irrelevant connection to an event that took place 32 years ago on a show that any idiot knows shouldn't be taken too seriously is just ridiculous. Clarkson is just as capable of being rude about certain types of British people!!

6. Get a grip, there are more important things in life

I think you need to research the home guard a little more carefully, because that statement is extraordinarily offensive to the memory of the brave men, many of them first world war veterans who knew only too well the devastation of war, who were prepared to take extraordinary (sometimes suicidal) risks to try and halt the German advance if it came.

Incidentally, Clarkson has done exceptional work for forces charities and is a fantastic supporter of the British military

Dad`s Army is an English TV comedy. doh

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_j07UqaqiVr...mainwaring.jpg

EDIT: The picture is Captain Mainwaring from the aforementioned TV comedy quoting his favourite saying.

Mezo.

Discussion of the many points of view applicable to the Falklands/Malvinas is entirely relevant to travel in Argentina (and, by extension, to travel elsewhere in the world). Insults and name-calling directed at others posting here is not.

I'm too weary to start sifting through the posts above, editing out offensive content. Please take it upon yourselves to self-edit, or I (or other moderators) will feel compelled to remove whole posts or the entire thread.

Thanks much, and have a merry, friendly, mutually-supportive holiday!

Mark

yes, I am aware of that thank you

Well, yet again, a selective bit of quoting from yourself to try and change the meaning of a post. You should go into journalism.

I don't believe thousands died during the making of top gear, which is what the get a grip statement was about, which I think is fairly obvious.

The separate statement to read a good book related to your request for a history lesson on the Falklands so to quote the 2 as though they are together is somewhat disingenious and missleading.

Try and read the posts properly, and not then take sections out of context to try and prove your own point, there's a good chap.

I presume your rather hysterical and missleading rant about thousands dying is in reference to the Falklands conflict, which as I say wasn't what I was referring to when I said there are more important things in life, but I suspect your knew that and your probably just being obtuse.

Thousands didn't die in the Falklands conflict, the official death toll is 907, but never let fact get in the way of a good bit of hysterical journalism eh!!

It's a debatable point that in Argentina the war actually saved lives. It meant a probably bloody conflict with Chile was avoided, while it removed a military Junta that had been in place for some years and had murdered many of their own civilians. Some estimates put this number at up to 30000 people killed between 1976 and 1983. Who knows how many more would have been murdered had the Junta not been topled by the war. A controversial point I know, but worth mentioning all the same.

I don't really see that the time of year has much relevance to the discussion, although the fact that the program in question is due to be aired in 2 days time probably does.

I spent 23 years serving as a member of the Army medical services, so spare me a lecture about the effects of war, I already know thanks.

It appears to me that cultural differences between our nations - that is the people taking part in this discussion have formulated very different perspective,approaches and viewpoints to a country way down in the south Atlantic along with Argentina and inded Mr clarkson.
Maybe the British have a deep set loyalty to the Falklands these day because of the will of the Falkland people, the war and the losses of life - on both sides.
Maybe we can see the irony and humour of Clarkson that maybe is lost on other nations senses of humour.
Maybe the British having had a history being from ''old europe'' and not from the new worlds like America and Australia (Please note I say that with no offence to anyone). Then our perspective and reading into history (and Clarkson for that matter) differs from those other nations.

Lets all ''calm down and carry on''as they say - over here. So on that note I would like to say a veritable merry Christmas and a calm and pleasant new year to all of you wherever you are or whatever your views - that very much includes our good friends in Argentina.

Jake bier

Back on a hopefully less contentious footing, I enjoyed the entertainment (read lighthearted/ humourous, not to be taken seriously...) and scenery/ photography that part 1 of the Argentina Christmas Special offered last night. Part 2 is tonight (BBC2 8pm UK time).

In between here's a video by one of Clarkson's sidekicks Richard Hammond testing the (old) Africa Twin

TOP GEAR special, excellent mix of Lovely scenery, silly jolly japes and clowning around. Stayed pretty neutral and let the thugs show themselves for what they were - not representative of the ordinary Argentinian nation.

Jake.

And the man, Clarkson, and the other two, show yet again that you don't need a 4x4 to travel. (Yes, I do fully understand that they had a 31 man team of cameramen and more than enough 4x4 tagging along, but that 's not the point).
For anyone who has not seen this programme, they travelled in 3 old cars, all with V8 engines in a homage to V8 technology before it disappears, for ever.

Wonderful stuff and a great satire on the whole travel business.
The British have always been good at satire.

It's been said before, maybe here I can't remember, that Argentina had a great opportunity for some excellent, free tourism publicity but I doubt that will work on this occasion - I watched the Top Gear Vietnam "jolly jape" of a few years ago on an aircraft somewhere over the middle east - the franchise is pretty much world wide nowadays.

So Clarkson`s cocked up yet again, how many chances do you give an employee before you sack him?

Should nickname him "Teflon" :cool4:

Mezo.

Any bets that all the "no player is bigger than the team" stuff gets hushed up this time? So far the rule is that if you make the BBC millions in export payments you can punch who you like.


Andy

I went of Clarkson when he stated he was the tallest person in the BBC & that "he lorded over everyone else" what an arrogant statement to say to his colleagues.

He is so far up his own arse that he needs knocking down a couple of pegs.

Mezo.

Hmm, well, we'll see. Many years ago I remember sitting in a cafe in the middle of nowhere in Turkey watching Benny Hill on the tv. Whatever happened to him and the "millions" his programmes made abroad? :rolleyes2: Someone (can't remember who) said at the time (80's) it was the programme on which the sun never set as it was always on tv somewhere.

Maybe if they boot Clarkson out they could get John Prescott in to replace him :rofl: He seems to have a similar punch first and ask questions later mindset. Or I could do it - on the basis of Clarkson's tweet a couple of weeks ago I'm perfectly qualified: "Wanted: new presenter for Top Gear. Applicant should be old, badly dressed and pedantic but capable of getting to work on time." In the spirit of Clarkson's ghost I'll shortly be denouncing bikes as anti democratic and bikers as homicidal maniacs fit only for breaking rocks in a chain gang. That should definitely get me the job. :rofl:

I suspect though it'll be put down to stress in the workplace, "something that the BBC, as a responsible employer, takes very seriously". "Mr Clarkson will be taking a break from the day to day responsibilities of a busy filming schedule and undergoing medical assessment" (while we work out wtf to do with him).

Of course that'll only work if Clarkson keeps his mouth shut and doesn't use his newspaper columns to put his side of the story across - something I'm sure the editor of the Sun would dearly wish to see. :rofl:

"The mans a knob, but i quite like him" :rofl:



Mezo. (and oil that door hinge)

I would think that JC has seen through the BBC and had enough of them.
Was Blackmail the Reason the BBC Capitulated?

Somewhere else it has been said that his contract with the BBC is up in about a month.
He can move on, but the BBC is not capable of doing the same.

Even better, Guy Martin is up for his job :clap:

https://fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.n...bf8834b222a30c

https://www.facebook.com/tycobmw/pho...087073/?type=1

Mezo.

And on that bombshell, goodnight Hubbers.

Mezo.

there's a couple of guys on another forum I am on who have actually met him on the shows and say he is a really nice guy in real life, always took time out to chat with the audience, very laid back and approachable.

He did punch piers Morgan once, which makes him alright in my book!!bier

The reality is we will probably never know what happened, it takes 2 to tango and it may well be the other bloke deserved a slap.

I would think the other channels are rubbing their hands with glee at the thought of maybe being able to sign him up.:Beach:

If I get into a fight at work they’ll sack me. End of. If you both throw punches you both get the sack regardless of who started it, who was stressed, who thought that breaking the traffic laws in North Yorkshire again then going and getting ratted in the local pub was getting boring etc.

I’ve worked for huge corporations with the moral standards of a stoat in a cat foot factory. If you steal or get in fights they sack you even if you are the star salesman or are ****ing the boss because they know everyone else will be less effective (and less afraid of getting sacked) if they don’t.

The way Clarkson sets up production companies and gets the BBC to buy shares and so forth is bad enough. As a license payer I want Clarkson gone if he did throw a punch or a series of resignations from managers above him who have obviously lost control. The BBC will get along without Clarkson, if will cease to function if everyone starts to act like him. If he stays they should make him Director General as he will be the one in charge anyway.

Andy

Less than 2 days into this world-shattering event (breaking news anyone?!!) and the petition to reinstate him has around 3/4 million votes and the one to sack him has 5. That's five, not 5 million.

We could all speculate about this - I've little doubt that the media will continue to do so, as it deems appropriate - but I think the range of views is just about covered in this web blog, including the comments section:-
The Problem Child

With you sharing all the hot news from ABR, I won't have to go there anymore to read of what's top and what's not.

Has Utaka been unbanned yet?

Let the Liberal Lefties suppress the truth why let a good story get in the way of the facts

Seems to me once again the Mob are out - sod the need for a hearing, sod the facts known or otherwise - we will get some hearsay, exaggerate it and just hang im anyway maybe even worry about the trial afterwards.

In law you can not take his past behaviour (even though much of it has been inflated and exaggerated by the liberal nazi's in any case) into account until he has been judged on this case and found guilty of it.

More so if he has or had punched someone ( a proper punch - you know causes pain, bleeding bruising that sort of thing) then I think the proper Police would have been called and be lifting him for assault - that's not happened.

I am not defending him - nor his actions but then again I do not know the facts - so can happily sit back and wait. Oh silly me i am almost being fair balanced and just - tut tut. (just won't do for an ex copper would it).

As for Top Gear if he goes i would think it goes - no one can replace him without his say so - he owns 30 odd % of the top gear Brand.

As for him being a buffoon - he is actually quite a clever, rich and by all accounts very pleasant buffoon, whereas his persona is maybe not.

Someone mentioned Benny Hill, he wasn't a pervert his tv persona was sort of - don't judge the man by what you see on the telly - it's not all true you know.

As for TV management I have little doubt the powers that be are so far to the left they have almost gone back round to the right.

I would think they wield considerable power along with maybe a huge dollop of influences of some degree on some of the far left attitudes and political over correctness within the BBC / TV industry. (Clarkson clashes with this a bit as we all know - so he must be a threat even though a huge worldwide following see him as he is - acting as a overpowering, overgrown knob.

However Clarkson does have quite an ability to put complex matters into words on paper in a simple readable and somewhat jaunty manner - may well be a threat - more so to some of the deep lodged top blokies (and ladies - lets not be accused of sexism - and of various nationalities - and races - think I covered the racist card there as well !)

Now sitting back, battening down the hatches - and waiting !!!! :stormy:


Skål jake.

Check out the odds & who` tipped favourite to replace him if the punters are wrong & he does go, HERE.

To Replace Jeremy Clarkson as Top Gear Presenter: 2/1 Chris Evans, 7/2 Johnny Vaughan, 6/1 Steve Coogan, 8/1 Chris Moyles, 8/1 Tiff Needell, 12/1 Jimmy Carr, 12/1 Jodie Kidd, 16/1 James Blunt, 20/1 James Nesbitt, 20/1 Jay Kay, 25/1 Rowan Atkinson, 25/1 Patrick Kielty, 33/1 Johnny Vegas

Mezo.

We have come some distance from the JC views on motorcycles (as per the title of this thread) which themselves are all part of his public media persona, but no one appears to mind.

Jake,
There is reporting that JC sold his rights to the Top Gear brand to the BBC some time ago; combine that with other reporting that he is out of contract with the BBC in about a month and I don't suppose he could give the proverbial damn about a BBC disciplinery enquiry.
They, the BBC, could, for instance, sack him one day and offer him a new contract the next, thereby saving face for the BBC.


Based on the tone of your post I think you might enjoy the information and exchange of views contained within my earlier link (which does not link into ABR in fact).

Walkabout - Dave , quickly read your link - yes its got a few good points - i quite like the way its been put together.

As for JC view on motorbikes that's fine - why should he like them he does not have to nor does he have to withold his views. would any of us like our positive views limited and suppressed i think not. On another note my mother hated them - my elderly next door neighbour hates them and is terrified by them, even my wife dislikes them - now - even though she's traveled a fair bit on one. Why do people have to like them they can dislike and voice that opinion as much as we like / love/ live for them and god can we spout off and talk about them and how wonderful they are. Simply differing views and experiences- its a good thing.

I wasn't aware Clarkson had sold his shares - local press stated today he had 30 odd % - so maybe again unsubstantiated semi facts from the media - and i was taken in by them.

As for Clarkson what happens to him one way or the other matters not a jot to me - I have other things that directly affect my life if he moves on it won't affect anything at all in my small world.

That said i don't like to see the pre judgement and lynch mobs getting themselves worked up into a frenzie at the smell of easy blood.

However i very much think all big institutions like the BBC, NHS, Police, etc need someone within the ranks constantly fighting back and pushing boundaries as a counterbalance to the oppressive regimes that manage and wield power.
In a country where it seems everyone is or can be offended even when things are not directed at them, the suppression of words, thought and the distortion of quotes /history / facts is becoming the way of life - and it seems many folk can't see it - the words racist, homophobic, Hero etc are bandied about and misused to such a degree that they have largely lost meaning and are used out of context or without thought. Someone pushing against this and upsetting a few people really can be a good thing. Getting physical in the workplace is not acceptable but it happens - i have certainly seen it at times in the careers and places i have worked in.

On another note some people (and i do not point the finger here at anyone in particular) sometimes really deserve a good bop on the nose.

As for ABR i think Chris must have a bee in his pants about them at the moment - but on the other hand he's a really nice chap to sup a beer with as long as you don't mention ABR or CCM :) .

Jake. Freedoms are in peril, they need defended with all might

Dunno about the lousy odds! Oh to see Rowan Atkinson hosting Top Gear :lol2:

http://i916.photobucket.com/albums/a...pspfifyrb4.jpg

All we know he`s called Mr BEAN.

Mezo.

I probably got that report from the comments that are appended to the Problem child blog; I don't quite recall where I read that.
But, the writers in that blog - there is more than one - tend to do their research before putting pen to paper/fingers to keys.

Take a further dig into the web blog; there is considerable food for thought on your themes herein.
The most recent writings show up below whatever the current blog is showing in the home page and all of the earlier blogs are contained in the drop down menus at the top.
Some contributors have axes to grind, others wish to express the truth based on their own research and considered thought process - something like the HUBB then, but with a wider remit :thumbup1:

Jake
Thanks for the character reference. :helpsmilie: My mention of ABR a few posts ago wasn't negative. I go there to read the gossip and be entertained. Clearly Walkabout does too. Around the time he was posting statistics regarding how many people have allegedly signed pro/con JC petitions, the same topic was trending on ABR. No useful content over there = no useful content over here = no problem.

Hope you're at Danny's MMM at the end of the month Jake.

Walkabout: Are you coming too?

Hi Chris

I won't be making Dannys do im afraid, i am in the process of training in Motorcycle wheel building - with a view to starting a small business from home - I will be doing my practical exams around then and hopefully getting my tickets to trade and as such am pretty busy with a very steep learning curve.

Catch up later in the year Cheers. Jake.

A catch up will have to be before the summer. I'll be out of touch for a while after that. Shame you're not qualified already: I would have sent some work your way. :oops2:

I would like to know who made the complaint, was it the other party, I suspect not, there is a supposed facebook convo going around between the 'victim' and another saying that he wasn't punched and the press have just built it up to be something from nothing.

So far, I have seen not one shred of corroborated evidence, just hearsay and opinion of the 'I knew a bloke once who was there' variety.

Personally, I think someone has the knives out

BTW, the way Clarkson has made money from running a production company and selling the rights is not unusual, lots of celebs do that, It's how Chris Evans made his money (Ginger productions) and I believe Tarrant had the rights to Millionaire. There are plenty of others.

Well his mate thinks he punched him "bit of a dust up" he says.



Mezo.

He also said he wasn't there, and wasn't that serious!

I think you just showed the dangers of selective reporting!

Mezo.

Jeremy Clarkson view of motorcyles
 

Would it be as funny or acceptable if some Libyan Clarkson type went to Scotland and made snide references to the Lockerbie bombing?

no, it wouldn't, and I don't recall Clarkson making jokes like that about terrorist atrocities in other countries either so it's a rather pointless statement!

Foreign TV stations do actually frequently put out offensive content about the UK and /or it's citizens!!

One thing to consider, this isn't a live show. The final cuts are approved by editorial and directorial teams. They are responsible for what goes out on a sunday night.

They carry a responsibility for what goes out on TV, because it's them that make the decisions. Where are they when all this nonsense about what he did or didn't say and what it may or may not mean is going on!!

But, looking at the inquiry, and who ran it, he had to be sacked. you can't go round smacking people at work and expect to get away with it, not these days, not with everyone being in touch with their feminine side and all that.

Comparisons with the Saville affair are rather annoying and disingenuous, but what that did prove is that no one should be so important as to be above the law or untouchable just because of who they are.

If the producer would have been sacked for punching Clarkson, then Clarkson has to be sacked for punching him.

I hope he tries something different & not come back with another motoring show, that would show to me that he is indeed a knob.

Why not have a go on the big channel (BBC 1) with his own show "Clarkson" along the lines of Parkinson or riskier "Clarkson Uncensored" on commercial telly (the opposition) a live show with audience, be good to see if he could pull that off.

Mezo.

I wouldn't be at all surprised if he took the whole enchilada including the Hamster and May to another network!

http://d26ya5yqg8yyvs.cloudfront.net/lurker.gif

not sure anyone would be brave enough for that!:helpsmilie:

he has done other stuff, like his documetary on the victoria cross which was really really good,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tpg6h16k8eU
and he appears on other shows every now and then.

There is a rumour all three are in discussions with Netflix

Yes he can be a kn0b at times but I quite like his says what he likes and likes what he says attitude. But all good things have to come to an end at some point. Don't think anyone will replace the Top Gear team, don't even think the BBC should bother trying.

Wayne