February 09, 2009 GMT
I Thought It Was Over But It's Not.

30.1.09. Perito Moreno, Argentina.

Pics from Chile, words from Argentina. Strange days indeed.

Just as, famously, there's a fine line between clever and stupid, there is only the narrowest of demarcations separating tearful, panicky dismay from demented, sky-punching euphoria. I get the first one from a misfiring cylinder, compounded by my apparent inability to change a spark plug without dropping it deep into the dark heart of the engine; and the second from finding a mechanic who can do the job properly, resulting in a custard-smooth motorbike and a soppy grin.


You know what it's like. One minute everything in the world is completely bollocks; an hour later you are, literally, a millionaire Jesus, covered in girls and throwing 180's every turn.


That track by The Feeling is a magnificent, strutting rooster of a song, is it not? Look a little closer... and the rooster is wearing a smart new beret!


But what about a Top 5 booze tunes? Not in order...
Closing Time - Semisonic
Still Be Around - Uncle Tupelo
Have A Drink On Me - AC/DC
Whiskey Blues - Muddy Waters
Gin & Juice - Snoop.
All 16 songs off of Frank's In The Wee Small Hours would also fit the ticket. None of 'em specifically about boozin', but you sure as hell get the picture.


While we're "at it", can there be a music video based on a less convincing premise than the one* in which the fat lad out of Keane outruns a couple of motorcycle assassins? The only vehicle Tubbyguts could outrun -surely to Christ- would be an ice-cream van.

I swear on the tear-sodden grave of Tony Hart that I just overheard this conversation:

USA Man: Where I come from, roadkill and hunt-meat recipes are a really important part of our cultural heritage.
USA Woman: Fer sure! My mom's beaver is delicious!

One hardly knows where to look...


What sort of TV channel, I wonder, would show you the first half of a Barclays Premiership match, then at half-time, give you the full-time score complete with highlights, and only then show you the second half? Do you think it might be the Blithering Idiot Channel?


What in the ruddy heck d'you think "Membrana en Pasta" might be? Ive just seen it advertised on a billboard, and I'm nearly certain I don't want any of it in my mouth.

*The Lovers Are Losing, 2008

Posted by Simon Fitzpatrick at February 09, 2009 09:36 PM GMT

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