Hi Touring Ted
Thanks for all your help, the problem is fixed. I went back to the store, bought the other 12v relay which I saw yesterday (also with 4 pins) and trotted around the corner to an auto electrician to show me how to match the pins from the old one to the new one. He wanted to see the bike so I went back to the campsite, push-started the bike and drove it in (Without the fairing and the headlights it's an ugly looking bike).
He plugged the old relay back in and it worked........somehow it must have got unstuck from all the handling. I did ask him to show me how to bypass the relay which he did. Remove the relay, then run a connection between the battery pin and the starter pin and the bike starts as if the relay is in and working. The wire can then be removed and the bike runs normal.
Total cost of the repair $nil (I returned the other relay and got my $3 back). Total aggrevation and stress......just about nil as well